Monday, October 31, 2011

People

Every day, or some days, you learn something about someone you thought you knew. I know Rev. Said we are complicated . If I put that into perspective,I can say, two people are being complex now. I learned something new and I can't share it with these people.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

WE got a name


Well, we finaly decided on a name for our pet. Her name is Pepper. We like calling her that cause she's hot and holds her own. She actually comes to us sometimes:) Welcome Pepper. We are happy to have your spirit with us.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

I'm a Sisterlock Trainee


Today, Ocotober 18, 2011, I finished my training to become a Sisterlock consultant. I am now considered a trainee. That means I can install, and retighten your sisterlocks. I have enjoy so much this learning. It was the bomb. My Master Instructor Denise Dixon, was patient and kind and very very knowledgeable. I wish I could sit and watch her work. She has skillful hands. I hope to be as good as she one day and have a full book of clients. Love it. Absolutely love it. I'm very very happy. You just don't know.

here we are at the close. We werent' allowe to take pictures during class so all I have this the last day of laughs.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Cooking

I'm in the kitchen slaving over the stove, cooking pot pies, getting ready to make Toll House Cookies and where is the baby?

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Our short walk in the park



she kept up really well. Enjoyed the walk. Now I have a partner that won't complain or disturb.

She's here

Well, we waited 2 plus hours for her to arrive. Arrival was wonderful. I watched so many families welcome their new pets into their hearts on Friday night. Such hugs, smiles and kiss and what are you going to name him? It was a great spot to be at. Those people that work that cargo sure must love that, when so many come through there.

So here she is. Name to be finally determined hopefully this week. It was rough hearing *go slow* more then enough times. I called it getting ready, they called it rushing. So today, we did not a darn thing. Layed around after eating and living the life of luxury.

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Waiting still

Oh, I think I must have used that title already. Well, let's call it Waiting still. A you wait, you are being prepared for what is to come. We know not how it will be but we know, it will be. We are to read, keep busy and keep quite. No one wants to hear about your trials of each day you wait. It was like when I was planning my wedding. I couldn't say much to anyone unless they asked me. You want to share your joy but others aren't into YOUR joy. It can make you sick if you don't do something with the energy. All you can do is make sure that what you are anticipating has all the fixings for the happy day.

Monday, October 3, 2011

Over a week

Well now i find out it's going to be more then a week before she get's checked at the vet. Then we wait for a flight. All I can do is keep myself busy. Do busy work so i can still enjoy these last days of 56. It will be 57 all too soon, I'm sure.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Waiting

These are some of the baby pictures of her but when she gets here, there will be plenty. From Getting off the plane. Riding in the car, getting in the new home and more. It's a long, long, boring wait for our new family member.



i'm waiting. I'm thinking. I'm looking and reading and reading and surfing. Waiting for wha I do believe will be Karmann. Maybe one N. At least it's pretty. I do have some baby pictures of her so I'll put some here.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

The Girls Ride


Today, Heidi an I went for a nice ride. She rides way faster then me but said she was having a hard time. You couldn't tell me that:)

Monday, September 12, 2011

Back to the Cape today. it is gorgeous down there. The sun shines on you like no other place. It felt like being at the Beach but the best part,.. no sand...lol. I did walk down a path that was sand and wanted to take off my shoes, but... did not have anything to clean up my feet with so. .. I let it be. I sat on the grass in the beautiful sun and ate Potato Salad and drank a bottle of water when done. It's a blessing to be in the presence.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Mile 2




Where she sleeps when not beeing rode. :)

I think I went just 2 miles today. I didn't want to over do it and have my ishium hurting again. I have to ried 2 more times to make sure it's just a breaking in period. But.. it still was uncomfortable. I push myself back in the seat and I don't know why that feels better.


Here are some shots of my short ride.

Monday, September 5, 2011

Cape Cod Canal First ride




Bike is here

And we were off. Yes, I had a good first ride. I was/am still a bit sore, 2 days later but I knew something was going scream at me. I'm glad it's my ishium and no shoulder or hand or leg issues.

I was just sent an email from Audrey and in it, there is a book by Holly Gerth. Seems like a nice book that we could read in our newly formed Women's Group. There are 3 of us so far and we are what I'll call the foundation. I'm sure in a year I'll little group will grow as we become The Lovely Wives. :)

So, here is the book any how and let's see if we don't add this to part of our group for discussion.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Bike on the way


I got to order my new bike today, thanks to my wonderful Husband Ray. He is sooo good to me. I will hopefully be picking it up this Labor Day weekend, Saturday and we can go riding. it's a beauty. Like getting a car your really want to drive.

Found Dunkin Donut in K cups. That's a good thing.


I only like Dunkin and now to have it in the cups will be easier then even using the filter. I say it's worth it. I don't drink coffee every day so when I do, I will actually like it now.

The vegetarianism is going slow. I like to juice though. Soaping, yea, I sold my first shampoo bar via the Loc it up group. I put up my pictures and a banner on Etsy shop and I will add more soap to that as I go along. This new recipe I made is making fantastic whiter color soap. I'll just change from Mango to Shea butter and leave it alone.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

I'm fruit Juicer


I am finding I love fruit juicing a lot more then veggie juicing.

3 pears
2 apples (green)
3 white peaches

Yummy.


Monday, August 22, 2011

Bottling Happiness





I Really wish we could bottle happiness. Today is a GORGEOUS DAY. Just the right temperature and breeze. I took a walk in my favorite park and enjoyed the music from my iPod. You can just walk and go mindless. Sky is perfect blue. There are a few clouds but not rain clouds. The trees are free and grey and the cars are leisurely rolling by. Sitting on my back porch just soaking it in. They should have kitchens outside so you can cook out all the time.. lol


Friday, August 19, 2011

The fat

can't fight the fat. Can't lose the fat. Can't get rid of fat. Sometimes I swear being bony has it's joys. But then they probably always hurt themselves in the hips. Pants don't stay up on chicken wings.

It's hot. I'm about sick of Hot. I like nice but hot. I guess I really don't tolerate it well. Cold. Heck no. Can't get warm enough in cold either. Where is the sweet spot in weather. ?

Today, we cashed in some articles and now I have money for my New Bike. It will be here September 3, if all goes well. I just going to pray each day for strength because I get weak. My body gets tired and I give up to easily when I feel like I'm not where I should be. I was younger and then I said, I was too heavy. Now... I'm heavy and older and am a Senior Citizen. By IHOP measures. wonder why they went so young.

I have a new exercise program and it uses the door hinges. The thing with this is you should have one in 3 spots, door hindge things and they send you one? one!!!! Nice set but looks like I'll be purchasing 3 other hinges of some sort.

God Bess Corey to grow past this evil spirited female in his life and learn his lesson. She will not get better. He can.

Monday, August 8, 2011

Friday, July 29, 2011

wow Kale

I made my first drink. No recipe per say but this is what I felt would be okay. Live and learn and know why.

2 cups Kale
1 whole lemon
2 celery stalks
1 apple
1 ginger root

wow. Does this make enough for one big drink. I was glad I put it on ice as it's HOT. did you get that.? I don't know anything about Ginger root but today I know, IT'S HOT!!!! It feels like I put in Cayanne pepper or something.

I'm getting it down cause now, I know, I got in fresh greens. Not over cooked by myself. I just plan to drink one Juice a day. Now to drink the other 2 ounces in the glass..

Sunday, July 24, 2011

It changes

It amazing how your life can change in 8 hours. Earlier today I was in tears. Very upset. So much before me to get done. 8 hours later and I feel amazingly happy. I gave away my Gas Grill and some leg weights and .. the people thanked me for it. That feels good.

got to the bottom and I do mean the bottom of one room. I could even sweep it. Pictures to come.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Giving


It feels so good to give. I don't know how to compare it to what feels as good as giving. It just brings joy to me to be able to share some of what I have with others so that it also will bring joy to them. Thank you God for giving me the gift of Giving.

If you are reading this post and want to sample some of my Handcrafted soap, email me and it will be on the way:)

Juicing



We got a Breville Juicer. So far so good. I won't rave about it cause there is not enough counter space for all my appliances. I thnk I like kitchen helpers..

Made apple juice today. should have taken a photo but this will definitely not be the last. There will be plenty more as I experiment with the apples to find the brand that is good to taste.

These were Granny Smith's . Not bad. Drinkable and I even drank the whole 3 apples.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Eating Meat

I am so hungry. I know I'm not a meat eater now. I can truly do this. We shared our first anniversary in West Yarmouth, Cape Cod. I said I was going to eat meat. Well, it wasn't all that. It made me more angry that you can't even get a decent burger the way you want. I figured, go to UNO Chicago Grill. Well, I took one bit and damn it all, was red inside. My husband saw it and saw the angry look on my face. I was so done. he called for the wait staff, they apologize and took it away. it comes back with the manager and it was much better. I mean, if meat cooking is not your specialty then don't offer it. What 's so hard about a well done hamburg that is suppose to be so hand made. .. I got sick of seeing meet. I had a Burrito at Sam Diagos. It was good but would I get it again, maybe. It was my first time there and the food was great. I just expected to pick that up and eat it like I do at home. In a wrap. No, it's in a wrap but it's way to sloshy to pick up. It's a knife and fork ordeal. My babe loved all his food.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Workshops and Seminars

i am to go to one or give one. This card keeps on coming. it will be two weeks tomorrow for my vegetarian life style. It's great. not missing a thing. My book finally came in. By Any Greens Necessary. just have to sit and read it now. Lord, I need a dumpster service and people willing to put in some time. Thank you.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Awesome

Today I woke up fine. Good spirits. Hair is great. I used my new shampoo bar and love it. Now I won't ever ever ever buy store bought shampoo. A bar is great.

Still no meat. Great. I found my graphic artist and we will work to get a logo for my soaps. I will then be able to have a custom design just for the soaps and products. Now I don't have to think on this.

Missy Beaver is sending me both her DVDS. Now does this rock or what? oh ya. That means I'll be kettlebelling up again. Now that, I really don't mind. I do love them. The other dvds were just too fast for me.

I don't think I'm exercising today. Just not feeling it. Happy about learning Graphics if I join a group called Lynda.com This place teaches you about any software program you want. I used to take tutorials years ago to learn Dreamweaver. But, I never needed Dreamweaver. I couldn't tell you to this day how to do a layer. I miss the pc for those fun days. It was nice working with someone instead of having someone just tell you what to do at the Apple store. They are busy and I don't feel creative but I still go for those hot things you just need an answer on right away.

Someone called me Vegetarian

lol. My friend is planning a gathering for her daughter who is going off to California to work as a Doctor. We were in D'angelos talking food. I asked her to make a Calzone Veggie. It was funny, she looked at me and said, Oh, ya, YOU'RE A VEGETARIAN. I said. yes. !!!! It felt good and just normal. Makes me keep myself this way also when others confirm it.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Yummy in my tummy

I made some Low Fat chewy Granola Bars today and I will be making these again. Easy, delicious, and healthy.

Each day is different

Why is it one day you can wake up with a smile on you face. Another day in the same week and you feel like you can punch a bull out. I don't get it. I don't want it. Today is a Bull day.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

and again

we made it through another no meat day. I ate some fish and that's not meat.... is it? I wanted to get it out of the house but I still like fish so I don't think that will be put away. Hope not. I had candied sweets, one potato, Quiche, some noodles and some salad. A great day was had by me.

It's working

I don't know what day it is. I'm not going to count days, but weeks. So I've been doing this since June 2.
I had a client massage, and come to find out, she's vegetarian. This will be just find. The more people I surround myself with that do this the easier it will be. She also agreed, going vegetarian and doing it all your life is a transition. I signed up for Vegetarian times email and will probably get the magazine. I like to read paper rather then internet versions. Even though I'm always reading on the computer. I still like my paper. you can take it with you when you're not hooked in to the net.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Day 2

Done. I did no meat again today. I feel fine. I am missing nothing and I had three different meals so, I'm happy. I wonder if I can call myself a Vegetarian after doing this for a week:?

Monday, June 6, 2011

Meatless Monday

I did it with no problem. . No meat at all today. Breakfast - eggs and grits. Lunch - pita pocket of green peppers, onions, mushrooms and cheese. Then to top it off for dinner, I made a good eggplant parmesan. It came out great. Peelneggplant, dip in eggs, dip in whole wheat bread crumbs, fry. Spindle with parmesan chesse. Then pour on marinarra sauce. Bake about 10 minutes until bubbly. Then lay on mozzarella cheese. Bake until melted, enjoy with spaghetti

Hum. Now I see

I see at this blog it has vegetables on it. Did I know when I chose this that this was where I was headed? Not at all. Too bad it's so loud but we may as well make it loud.

I'M GOING VEGETARIAN AND PROUD OF IT.

YES, I've decided to go with the vegetable and fruit and nuts and legumes. Just waiting for my book to arrive so I can get at this properly. don't want to say, Oh I just eliminate meat. Well, I think I'll still eat Chicken and Seafood. I like my fish and sometimes a Little Chicken Parmesan my not be bad. It's more for my health now then the animals. I love animals but I'm not at the point of thinking my not eating them is going to save the planet. I have to save me and grow some stronger hair. That's my reason. Get off the blood pressure medication. It's not a strong one, just a precautions one.

Yesterday I ate only one meat meal and that was the bacon. I did that to get rid of it as I Just can't throw away food unless it's bad.

today, Monday June 6, is meatless Monday. I'll get a gadget to put on this site so we remember no meat on Mondays and then go forward.

I could have had my book here now but I decided to save $5. Wow. $5 and I could be reading or $5 in my pocket for more learning and supplies in my soaping adventures.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Another month flew

Man, I dont' get how these months are flying. I swear they are flying more when I'm not working then they do when I was working. Wow. Any how. I went for my usual but again, different, walk in the park today. That park is so uplifting. It picks me up when I"m down and it holds me when I'm cold. it warms me and welcomes my spirit. I talk to the trees and I get info from them also. Today my info was, use the Butterfly that you love as my watermark on my soaps. I might call my soaps Ancient Health, Ancient Heritage, Sun-Daze or even CocoPalm. I plan to put cocoa butter in all my products, hence the name cocoa and the palm oil will be in most of my soaps. I don't know. Names are so hard to choose. My sister says don't go doing what everyone else does by using the word *natural*. So, that's out. I can't call out to one ethnicity as that's not what it's about either. It's about using using good, natural, products from Africa, Ghana and Italy for the Olive Oil. All good oils with something to add to everyones skin. I love my soaping hobby and so look forward to sharing it with the world. Ya, I mean, I wish it makes it all the way to Cali, Texas, Wyoming, Washington State, and all the other states I'm looking at on this map on my wall. Got this map so I can relate to where others are as I read their blogs.
Here is a picture of what i'm talking about.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Lotion and soap

I just received some fantastic scents from a company I have used before but I think it has gotten better. I now believe I will be heading this way more often. I want to say, Bramble berry is kind and fast and you can get what you want in the amount you want. it is to no advantage of the company to have limits when there are a lot of soapers an crafters that do not want a large amount. most times you need to try it before you buy anything in a large amount. Companies like that force you to buy excess stuff that you don't need. when you shop, you should be able to get what you want at the market. Doesn't matter if it's one Banana or two bulky rolls. So to Bramble berry I'm glad to be able to make lotion today and use my new scent Mayan Gold. This stuff is so heavenly. It's very aromatic sexy tone and I just don't know, you won't find this in Victoria Secret. I also purchased Linden Blossom and Lavender and Herbs. Now I got the Lavender and herbs I was thinking for a nice clean scent. I want to have the room the Clients come in to get their massage smell earthy and clean. And..I tell you Linden Blossom is clean. So, If you are reading my blog and would like to try a bar, drop me a line, I'll send you some.

Walked today

Took a very long walk in the park today. I really really like that park. I don't know if I'll be doing any other exercise this evening but we'll see. I'd love to yoga at night but then I get so comfortable and don't want to move to the floor. :)

Monday, May 9, 2011

Wow Interesting

People really do read your blog. Well, I came to complain about being unemployed. I have a lot of skills I can do but all these skills cost money. Sure I make soap, lotion and sew but none of it can get done without the money to purchase the products. I feel this is a waste of time in my life because I want to learn how to install and maintain sisterlocks but I don't have the means. Am I not suppose to say that out loud? Well, it's the truth. Today, I'll be home doing not a darn thing. I've washed and waxed the floor. gone for a walk in the park and I have left over food to eat to nourish my body. All I can do I guess is read. Nothing more to be done. This is sad because I want to be productive and I can't.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

May Day... May Day

It's the first of the Lovely month of May. Lots happen in May. I have a gorgeous wedding to go to. My son turns 32 and of course, it's Mother's day Month. .. yup. all month I say. Never get enough of appreciating the mother figure in your life. I'll always love my mom, here and there. Cause you only get one, you only get on ya.. I'll always love my moma.

I've still been exercising, just not recording. I have so much to do. Get my sewing area in order. Make items for massage, lotion, creams and whips. Find a good home for where will be my office space. Too bad we don't have one of those under the step cut outs. I saw one in a magazine.

I hope to exercise today. Hope. If I can make sure my stomach is not full when it's time to exercise. Then I really have to get this pocket book done since I only have a few days left. But when I sew, it's all minds on the sewing. Not thinking of what else needs attention. All is well, it's beautiful out side and .. I'm going to sew.:) see ya.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Time Keeps on Slipping slipping

yes, I've been exercising. I did a walk in the park today and Friday. I did not post because I was beat. That first walk of the Season. Any way, I'm still on track. Sunday I did Body Gospel Revival. I'm doing. Too many places to post here and VF and see if the owner is brave enough to allow a Faith Based workout on her board. I just can't see why she has to think about it but, she does. I guess because I see nothing wrong with it. But if she hasn't tried it before, why not give it a go. ????

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Stretch In The Spirit

For some reason I must have dreamt I did this but this was not what I did in my dream. Weird. Any how it was really really easy. So easy it's ridiculous. lol I can do it all. I get wobbly on the semi tree pose and the one where you are standing you have to grab your foot in back of you. I held on to a chair tonight but I was still stretching.

I went to Home Depot and I'm going to get my own garden. 'm going to grow Tomatoes and Squash and what ever I can fit in that box that's going to my own personal garden.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Body Revival

So. We will get to learn this. :) It's fun. This one is much more invigorating then the Core Revelation. Glad we get a break in-between the two. I revisit Core in 3 days. Yea!!!

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Core Revelation

Why does that same topic appear under yesterday? I think I have to change that because that was today's exercise.

It was hard.
I had eaten too much food before exercising. The calzone was too much. too greasy and not as well as Saturdays. Don't roll it up.
The exercises were a bit hard for me to keep up with. I was not able to finish them all. I kept moving. My stomach is just too much and I swear I feel my breasts get in the way when I lay down. they come up to my throat it feels like.
Legs were sore just moving them in circles. It wasn't as if I didn't have energy, just difficult to keep them moving and lifted.

The stretch part was good, not a lot of stretching but okay.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Body Revival

This is mind blowing. Fun. Exciting. It makes you pray your way through it. I was saying, Come on God, we can do this. Let me finish.

I did. I did it all. I was not able to do the hops but I did the modified and I FINISHED. !!!! That is glorious. Oh man, I am anxious to see how I am at the end of these 30 days. She's good. Very good.

Thank Goodness

Yes, Thank goodness it's not all done just because you don't finish the first time.
I'm going to do. Did you hear me???? I'M GOING TO DO!!!!!! BODY GOSPEL.
This is a 30 day program. I commit to this starting today. April 18. I will do day one today and tomorrow I will ask hubby to help with measurements. The dreaded numbers. Who cares, why do we always have to have a number next to every thing. Time born, birthday, anniversary, age, employed, retired even bowel movements are numbered. And who is to say, in what circumstance a number is a *good* number or a *not so good* number? I know they have this in blood levels but why attach them to a persons abilities to do a certain task? these people don't know us.. They don't see our bodies or know how they function every day. But yet and still, there is a fitness test that is going to put untrue knowledge in my head. Maybe I should do the fitness test, tell hubby to record the numbers and then see them AFTER the 30 days. Hum.. now that's a thought. I'm not in competition with any one so what does it matter if optimal health is what the goal is? Oh well.

I'm off of here now to get ready to do day one (1) I hope to be smiling no matter what I can or can not do. It's a journey right?

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Yes, working on it

Came into two really nice dance exercise DVDs or programs this week. I did Masala Bhangra and Piloxing. Piloxing is really fun and Masala is a hoot. I tell you, they both get you smiling and stomping your feet. I love them both. The uplift I needed.

WARNING: Turn your volume down Bhangra has music on their site.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

200 Squat and Push up challenge

HAS BEEN CANCELED DUE TO LACK OF INTEREST.. LOL

Blogging

Some days it's difficult to just sit down and write about how you did the day before. I think it, but coming to do it is work. lol

Okay so here is how it went yesterday. GREAT. Started off like lemons but when I did do Ellen Barrett's Skinny Sculpt, I enjoyed it. Burn the heck out of my shoulders. I'm going to be sure to put a post it on that one for deep shoulder work.

Ordered my Pink Sandbag and looking forward to a decent tutorial and program with that.

Doing pretty good with the eating, No complaints but I find the more, longer I stay up, the more I want to eat. Good thing there is fruit here. Keep the fruit and I'll eat it. Keep me from thinking of the Oreos, cakes and Cheese Curls in the cabinet.

Okay, now to go fill in my Points Plus for yesterdays Food. I'm really having a good exercise month this month. The colored circles help A LOT. I can see what when and where I am doing something. It's a thumbs up.

Monday, January 17, 2011

Blogging

Good thing blogging is where you can write what you want. No one to critique it just write it. So, I found a new blog. I say God is good in that I know he sent me to this site. No one on FV sent me there but I found it. I'm going to get to a goal that is incredible.

I found Marianne. Great because she does kettblebells. There is a need for someone that does GOOD kettlebells and puts up short workouts. We don't have to spend 45 minutes doing an exercise DVD to get results. I always knew Kettlbells were great and now I know I'm going to be doing them again. No money to put out. Yea.

the place is MyoMyTV.com

Kettlebell Sumo DeadLift - Exercise Tutorial

Kettlebell Sumo DeadLift - Exercise Tutorial

Abs, sandbag, and dip station.

too big and I don't want her butt on my blog. So check the link out to the right and know it's a nice exercise.

Swing THIS for Tight Buns! Kettlebell Swing Challenge

Swing THIS for Tight Buns! Kettlebell Swing Challenge

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Jumprope

To measure a jump rope correctly, stand on the middle of the rope with one or two feet.  The ends should come up to your armpits



Got a new jumpsuit today. Will start just a few tonight and it the way Zuz does it will intervals. That's how I got to 20 minutes the last time.

Health, fitness. I can do this

Friday, January 7, 2011

Tank Top Arms

F= That was my exercise today.
T= Power Walk 2/4
W = Back, Biceps and Thighs PowerFit
T = Power Walk
M = Yoga

New Web of info

I have found this, well I can't say I found it. I went looking it up after someone mentioned learning something from it. It's called Zuzuana. (bodyrock.tv) I am not fancy on her choice of work out fits. Baring too much skin is not necessary.

I do plan to do the exercises as much as I can as I'm looking for short but result proven exercises. Not sure if her's are proven but I was told they can be fun.

Yes, I want to have fun even if I can't do 15 or 12 of something. The other exercise DVDs on market are too long and too cute. I'm not into that either.

So, I'm going to by this dip station and a sandbag as soon as Josh Henkins gets them in. I'm going for a pink one so I"ll want to pick it up and use it.

I hope she does more exercise with the sandbags so we can get our money use out of that and the dip station.

Looking forward to my body fat loss this year. That's best I can say. FAT BE GONE.

But don't dwell on that. Dwell on Fitness, health, strength and endurance.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

finding a way

I have looking at so many ways to log, it's crazy. Tonight I came up with, use my own notebook. Made some lines in it for the points and will use the hand held calcultor for keep record.

I was looking at a streaming color journal, crazy, $24. Then I see some have some of what I want others have this but not that, not the right size, over size or too small...

Get my ideas and make it my own is what it comes down to.

When I get more written in it, I'll scan it and show you a page or two.